


In this Lifetime

by SoThisIsAThingIWrote



Series: Variations on the Theme of Reunion [2]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 01:54:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22825951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoThisIsAThingIWrote/pseuds/SoThisIsAThingIWrote
Summary: A play on the Rey at the Jedi temple trope, and a reunion of souls. Canonverse AU.This time it's not a nudge, it's a shove. Rey wakes up, starting so violently she nearly topples out of bed.Up, up!She finds herself on her feet, wondering how she got there.There's a bag in her hand (when did that get there?) and she's already stuffed a set of clothing and a few keepsakes into it.Go,the whisper in the back of her mind says, sounding for all the world frustrated,Go!"But-"Ahead of you, what you seek is ahead of you.She knows she is alone in the old AT-AT. She's always been alone here, but she could also swear she feels something pushing her out the door.If this is the Force,Rey thinks, stumbling out into the early morning air,it's awfully bossy.
Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Series: Variations on the Theme of Reunion [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1639465
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	In this Lifetime

**Author's Note:**

> I am a sucker for soul mates. just a big ol' mushy pile of goo. 
> 
> Playing on the "what if Rey was at the academy?" trope

His name is Finn, he tells her as they make their way through Niima outpost to the lone cantina, and he's here with his teacher on Jedi business. 

Rey doesn't know what a Jedi is, much less what possible business they could have on Jakku, but she does know that the man walking next to her, his tan robes flapping in the desert wind, both a - did not know how to handle himself around a happabore (hence her needed to rescue him) and b - was willing to offer her a meal in thanks. 

And Rey never says no to food. 

As it turns out, the Jedi don't really know what business they have on Jakku either. Finn's "teacher” is a man not much older than Finn himself is, skin fair where Finn's is dark, who introduces himself as Tai. He tells her that they were passing by the planet on their way back to the Jedi temple, when both of them felt the force-

"Kind of like a hand," Finn says, "reaching out to pluck us from the sky."

Rey also doesn't know what the Force is, but she is familiar with the feeling of something larger than herself, she tells them, flush over her mug of Jawa beer. Often times there are these….nudges;  _ go left _ when she thought to  go right _ , not now, look up, avoid this... _ a soft whisper in the back of her mind, in her bones. It's a voice that is not a voice, not really. It's a presence that never really leaves her. Gentle. Soothing. Nurturing. 

She doesn't tell them about the other nagging feeling she always carries. That something is missing, incomplete, that sometimes she finds herself reaching for a hand that isn't there, turning to speak to someone she could have sworn was standing next to her - 

Rey hasn't told anyone about that, not since Plutt took her shoulders as a young girl and tried to shake the feeling out of her.

Tai cocks his head, reaching out to ask for her hand. Confused, Rey complies.

"Ah." The Jedi says after a moment. "So  _ you _ are the business."

They offer to take her with them. The feeling in her bones, those soft nudges are the Force they tell her, the cosmic power that surrounds every being in the Galaxy, and at the Jedi temple she can learn to wield it. Rey watches in fascination as Tai lifts the remains of their dinner into the air above the table, weaving the suds from their tankards into a complicated pattern. She would be a student like Finn, and train to become part of something greater. 

_ Yes, _ the whisper murmurs quietly,  _ yes. _

"I'm sorry," Rey tells the Jedi. "I can't. I'm waiting for someone." 

She thanks them for the meal, pulls the cloth around her neck over her mouth, and begins the journey back to her home. She marks the wall with another line, pulls the thin blanket over her curled form, and imagines an ocean.

***

This time it's not a nudge, it's a  _ shove. _ Rey wakes up, starting so violently she nearly topples out of bed.  _ Up _ ,  _ up!  _ She finds herself on her feet, wondering how she got there. 

There's a bag in her hand (when did that get there?) and she's already stuffed a set of clothing and a few keepsakes into it.  _ Go _ , the whisper in the back of her mind says, sounding for all the world frustrated,  _ Go! _

"But-"

_ Ahead of you _ ,  _ what you seek is ahead of you. _

She knows she is alone in the old AT-AT. She's always been alone here, but she could also swear she feels something pushing her out the door.

If this is the Force, Rey thinks, stumbling out into the early morning air, it's awfully bossy. 

***

Rey falls in love with Yavin IV. She falls in love with all the green, with the morning dew, with the gentle rains that come at twilight. She falls in love with the temple itself, it's simple structures, and the low and sonorous bells that call the students to meals and meditation. 

She enjoys her lessons, she likes Finn and the other students company. Once she's shown how, she opens herself to the force as easily as breathing. She's a fast learner - so fast that even Master Skywalker has stopped to watch her once or twice. 

"Like Ben," Tai says one morning, after Rey has opened her eyes to find herself ten feet off the ground in a gently floating vortex of stones.

"Like Ben," Master Skywalker agrees. Knight and Master move on to other students, leaving Rey to touch back down and wonder;

_ Who is Ben? _

***

Rey does not particularly enjoy the chores. Sweeping the temple is meant to be almost meditative she knows, but far from calming her, she feels….restless. She thought the feeling in her bones, in the back of her mind would calm now that she is here, and in some ways it has, and in other ways….

It feels like a lothcat, prowling under her skin, itching to be released. The urgency she felt in the force to get here has been replaced by impatience. She feels a lot like she did on Jakku. Waiting. 

She still finds herself reaching for an imaginary hand. Turning to an imaginary someone seen from the corner of her eye.

She does that more than ever now. 

On the training grounds. Voe is teaching them how to wield a lightsaber. Rey feels ungainly as she tries to move through the forms, until she switches her grip, twirling the blade until it extends  _ behind _ her, and suddenly she moves much more freely, confidently. Voe's eyebrows rise nearly high enough to disappear into her hairline.

In the library. Rey has only the barest of grasps of letters, and nobody on Jakku had written texts, but she finds herself roaming the shelves, fingers skimming over cracked and peeling spines...

One morning she walks by one of the small dwellings that lay scattered around the temple grounds and stops dead for no reason she can think of. After a minute or so of staring hard at the closed door (she's never seen anyone go in or out, but there is still something lived in about it) she blinks, and continues on her way.

_ Soon, _ the whisper voice murmurs _. _

***

Halfway through dinner, Tai enters the hall and stands next to Master Luke. 

"The Grimtaash just triggered the proximity alarm," he says, "should be landing any minute now."

Master Luke stands. "Let's go and say hello."

Each step she takes, following the others out of the hall and into the early evening air, feels bigger than the last. There is something growing in her, so fast and so strong. It's like the lothcat has turned itself into a vine, spiraling up through her core and out past herself, searching for a place to tether. 

_ Quick _ , the whisper voice says,  _ hurry up _ . 

_ I am hurrying, _ Rey grumbles.  **_Why_ ** _ am I hurrying? _

Up ahead, a ship has touched down on the grass, the steam from the hydraulics of the ramp disappearing into the air. A blue and white astromech rolls down first, chirping happily at the sight of the Jedi master, and then a shadow blocks the light from within the ship and a form steps out- 

Rey stops.

The lothcat vine finds its tether.

_ Now, _ the whisper voice says.  **_NOW._ **

A pair of dark eyes meet her own across the field and oh,  _ oh - _

_ This _ is the person she's been turning to.

_ His _ is the hand she's been reaching for. 

Of course. 

"Ben," she says. 

_I have called you many names,_ the whisper voice says softly, oh so softly, and it's been her voice all along, hasn't it. _In many lives,_ _my dyad, twin of my heart, but in this lifetime you are Ben._

And then the voice disappears, and she is Rey; 

Whole, once again.


End file.
